The brutal murder of my younger brother in Germany stopped me in
my fast tracks to rethink about my life and its purpose. As I
was vying to become number one in Bollywood, when suddenly one
day I got a telegram from the Indian consulate in Bonn that my
younger brother who was doing well in the hotel industry in
Germany, had been murdered and that I would have to go and
collect his body.
My brother had wanted to put a stop to some drug dealings that
had been going on at the hotel where he worked. He refused to
give in to death threats by those involved. They warned him not
to interfere because it was dangerous. One night they killed him
and threw his body in the lake, but the killer was caught.
It was a very sorrowful and devastating
experience for me. I couldn't help weeping openly as I stood
looking at his room and all the material wealth he had acquired
in Germany. I found that he had everything he wanted. Every kind
of material item was there except my brother. That really hit me
hard. It made me realize that tomorrow I would also have to go
and leave everything behind. I realized then that I had acquired
so much wealth, popularity and fame but it was all going to be
of no use if one day I too would leave everything behind me and
go.
That was the turning point in my life that led
me to search God and reality. I returned to India with these
thoughts troubling me. It got to the point where I would roam
Bombay's Juhu beach all night searching for an answer. On one
particular night, the police arrested me thinking I might have
been involved in smuggling or some kind of criminal activity.
They let me go once they realized who I was My search for
answers led me to many places and philosophies , I still found
no peace.
|